You should understand that I have an almost irrational fear of guns, especially handguns. Here are some of the reasons it's irrational:
- It's irrational because I truly believe in our American right to bear arms.
- It's irrational, because, I've was raised, at least partially, in the country. Shotguns were a part of daily life, but they were for the boys. I was never taught how to handle the guns, a and, actually to this day, I've never shot a shotgun. My brother and cousin practiced shooting the shotguns by taking target practice at the snapping turtles in the pond on the farm. They received guns as gifts. My grandfather carried a shotgun in the trunk of his car at all times. The shells were in the glove box.
And here is the reason it is rational:
- I have, one time in my life, been a situation where a gun was used to threaten. I am not talking about being a witness to a robbery, or seeing something at a distance. I am talking about being in the room with a family member who had gone off the deep end, and who threatened to hurt themselves and other family members. Eventually, I ended up hiding in the closet of my bedroom until the danger, and fear passed. I was 13.
So, today, I had this opportunity to present itself. If you had asked me when I woke up this morning if I'd be shooting a gun today, I'd have laughed at you. But today, when the opportunity presented itself, I felt no fear. I felt the need to conquer. I needed to move from fear to healthy respect.
Over all, I think I did pretty well. The range was fairly short, but when we doubled the distance, I still did well. I was told not to "bulls eye" but to cluster. I was surprised by how tired I felt after 30 rounds. My shoulders hurt, and my aim definitely deteriorated with each clip. I shot a total of 50 rounds. I enjoyed it.
So, today I shot a handgun. I am not heading downtown to get my carry permit, yet, but I crossed a bridge. I feel good about it.
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